Capsule Computers Dungeons & Dragons RPG – The Story So Far.

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The Story So Far

An evil Warlock, Charles McManus (as the players recently found out), had summoned two men to a room containing only a table, a set of chairs and an over-arching partition, in-which he would use to address these newcomers. These newcomers were a plucky young magic-user named Strife and a mysterious, Tavi the thief. He had invited them to a quest to find an ancient relic, currently being held within a cave of Goblins. The two reluctantly accepted and were teleported by the Warlock to a patch of land just outside the cave.

As they arrived, they were taken aback by a man running towards them. They had quickly learned all they could off this man and sent him on his way. The Duo then headed over to the Goblins cave. It was there that they were greeted by some Goblin guards. The party quickly overcame this Goblin and proceeded inside.

After a short confrontation with a group of goblins involving lots of fire and even a fire beetle, the duo had obtained the artifact required and were teleported back to Warlocks lair. They handed over the idol and were allowed to leave for a short while.

A few days later the room was filled with new faces, but the magic-user was nowhere to be seen. The new members of this room were both assassins who went by the names Prinnia and Lucy. Suffice to say, it seemed as though one of the characters had a bit of a wardrobe problem while being teleported in and was left only with a belt. The other was keenly clad in leather. Both had excellent weapons at their disposal, Prinnia with her daggers and Lucy with her trusty hammer.

They had both taken to exploring the room, only to find that the only door out was locked and that they were being watched by a shadowy figure. He soon revealed himself to the duo (while keeping his name to himself). It seemed that this was the first time any of the characters had met. Lucy seemed to immediately take a liking to this Warlock and offered her body to him, which he immediately took. Whilst having her body accessed, Lucy determined that she would try to use this event to her advantage and tried to strike the Warlock, only to find that her attack bounced right off without it leaving so much as a slight irritation of the skin. For some reason, there was also a turd under the table.

Lucy and Prinnia had both been instructed by the Warlock to make their way to a mercenary camp to recover a relic stolen from a kingdom in the west. The duo reluctantly agreed and were teleported to a rather large tree nearby. From this tree they were able to spot a nearby mercenary camp and what looked to be a guarded cave. Prinnia, figuring herself clever, bolted in the opposing direction in an effort to shirk her duties. Lucy, well, she had other ideas.

Sneaking behind a nearby tent, she had managed to allure the guards of the cave into the previously mentioned tent. During special time together, Lucy had managed to tie her hammer to her belt and smack both of the guards so hard in their private regions that their heads had somehow exploded. She quickly left the Tent and noticed that a new figure was hanging around the caves. It was Strife the magic-user. The team had forged a pact and headed into cave. Prinnia was teleported in alongside them by the Warlock.

After a long and dangerous journey through this cave (I think Lucy may have been sexually assaulted a few times, her own doing I might add), the team of three had made it to the mercenary boss’ room. After a short battle (and a giant fire beetle), the trio had overcome this great ordeal and managed to obtain the stolen relic and were promptly teleported back into the room in which the quest had began. The Warlocks room.

Only this time, they were met by a monk by the name of Master Abbott. The team handed over the relic and were allowed to leave the room. Who was this monk? Did he just come back from a similar mission?

The team headed out of the door and entered the town. Looking back on the room that they had just exited from, they noticed that it was just a regular home. Yet, they knew better. They all split up to do their own thing.

Lucy went into the nearby bar and immediately began to look for anyone who seemed like they might be able to help them on their journeys. The taverns occupants had quickly sized up the naked elf and determined that she was not worth their time. Lucy, not quite liking being looked down upon like that, immediately challenged the biggest brute in the room to an arm wrestle in order to win his allegiance.

Master Abbott, the monk, felt his time would best be spent in service of his local monastery. So he headed over to castle in the center of the town and sat in on one of the towns local sermons. To his surprise the towns cleric was quite jubilant and even liked to have fun, he expressed this by frequently bursting out into song and dancing.

Whilst both Master Abbott and Lucy were having their own adventures, Prinnia was busy skulking the streets. Getting to know a foreign land and memorising it might be vital for an assassination at some point, she figured. She was soon spotted by a character that may-or-may-not have been an assassin or something else that wasn’t actually an assassin. Regardless of the confusing spiel that was being spat by this wanderer, it was clear that Prinnia could become a member of the local assassins guild, that may or may not actually exist, should she complete her task of assassinating the local cleric and bringing them his beard as proof. She accepted gleefully.

Meanwhile back in the local bar, Lucy was greeted by a Drow woman by the bar as she drank her ale. She was seemingly attracted to Lucy after seeing her so easily wrestle a gargantuan mans arm off with relative ease. She definitely wanted to tap some of that. Unfortunately for her, she couldn’t keep her cool at some of Lucy’s language and started a fight which she was not able to win.

The local storekeeper had sold a very nice crossbow and bolts to his latest customer, the magic-user Strife. The magic-user had no idea on the functionality of a crossbow, as evidenced by the fact that he almost bought it with a set of arrows. He was about to leave when he saw Lucy heading into the store with a Drow woman hanging slunk over her shoulder. This was pretty interesting.

Back at the temple, the monk was sitting and maybe even enjoying the flavor of the local monastery when he keenly sensed that something major was just about to happen. He managed to acrobatically flip from his seat and onto the altar where the cleric was currently singing and dancing. Grabbing the monks hips, the cleric had tried to manipulate Master Abbott into dancing with him, but was unable to get him to do so. The door to the monastery opened and Prinnia entered the room and grabbed a seat toward the back of the room. With the clerics assurance, Master Abbott returned to his seat.

Lucy and Strife were now engaged in a three-way barter between each other and the store owner for ownership of the currently unconscious Drow woman. The store-keeper offered 2 gold coins for the pleasure of owning such an exquisite woman, while Strife had offered two slightly different deals. The first was the hard to pass-up 3 gold and the other was consistent of two hats. Lucy, not being of the brightest intelligence (due to the drinking), had accepted the proposal consisting of the two hats. Strife had just found himself the proud owner of an unconscious Drow.

The sermon had ended and Master Abbott took his chance in trying to convince the cleric that something was not right and that that something bad was going to happen. Just as he was telling the cleric this, Prinnia had wanted to discuss something with the cleric. He took her back to his room, despite the monks warnings, and proceeded to ‘hear her out’. Master Abbott walked over to the room and kicked the door open. Just as the door flew open, Lucy had arrived just behind Master Abbott. The Monk now had to baby-sit two assassins.

Prinnia had managed to get a quick cut in on the cleric just as the door flew open. The assassin was now standing above the cleric as Master Abbott commanded Prinnia to stop. She had managed to when Lucy tried to thump Master Abbott in the back with her hammer (but she failed and it bounced off his back) and force her partially naked way into the room (she was slightly more covered now, thanks to the hats now hanging off her chest). The monk just had to look at her with fire in his eyes and she almost turned completely into stone. Paralysed in fear, Lucy was unable to move. Prinnia went to make another move when Master Abbott had managed to throw her against the wall, but only after she had managed to land the final blow against the cleric. He threatened to call the guards after the ordeal.

Strife was beginning to enjoy his time with his new unconscious girlfriend when he suddenly heard a sharp ringing in his ears, followed closely by a change in scenery. He found himself locked into this same room for what was now the third time. Looking around, he noticed that the half-elf Prinnia, the elf Lucy and the monk Master Abbott were also in this room. He also noticed that there was now a cleric with a slight loss in memory, as well as his now conscious girlfriend.

The team was brought back together by the Warlock who had tasked them into infiltrating their way into a Wizard research academy and obtaining an idol that was stolen from a kingdom in the west. After being practically coerced into the task, the team were teleported to just outside of a mage-tower that was being guarded by a duo of wizard guards. Using her body as an invitation, Lucy managed to lead the guards away from the entrance of the building and inside.

After a short-while of attempting to make a plan, the team headed in. Lucy was nowhere to be seen, perhaps she was being taken to where the idol was being kept? That would make things much easier. Strife, being a magic-user, headed up to the reception desk and enquired about the location of an idol. The receptionist began to flirt with the young magic-user and she promised to show him to an idol. She grabbed the boy by the hand and lead him down a nearby corridor. Master Abbott watched this from afar and figured the plan was going well. Prinnia had plans of her own, and began to sneak around the building.

Lucy had unwittingly picked a fight with two high-level mages and had a set of burning hands come her way. She was greeted slightly earlier by Strife and his female companion who saw the physical activity that three were partaking in at that time, but for when Prinnia had opened the door, Lucy was well on her way of becoming a burned piece of flesh. The assassin called for help, but the other one simply ignored it and closed the door. The two mages didn’t seem to notice.

The monk didn’t like waiting around the lobby with the cleric and drow, so he went to find out what it was that was taking Strife so long. He entered the hall and headed up the hallway. He entered the room that Strife and receptionist were occupying. He didn’t expect to find this particular idol, nor did he expect to see it engorged the way it was. He soon split the two apart and tried to explain the idol that they were infact looking for. The receptionist was puzzled and now slightly embarassed. After negotiating a pair of passes for himself and Strife, Master Abbott let her leave.


Somehow, Prinnia had found her way upstairs and decided to take a short break.

Both the monk and magic-user had returned to the receptionist and gained some guest-passes, which they were promptly given. They then headed up the stairs and met back up with Prinnia. After deciding to split-up, the group headed out of the nearby door and into the hallway. The magic-user and monk headed one way, while the assassin headed in the other. Both groups entered the rooms closest to themselves.

The assassin was in an empty room with two bubbling red potions sitting on a rack. Seeing that nobody was around she swiped the potions and put them away for later. She then left the room and headed up the hall.

Meanwhile, Master Abbott and Strife had entered a room that wasn’t quite as empty. The room also had these bubbling red potions, but this time, it looked like the two mage students were busy conducting experiments on the batch. For reasons unknown to the monk, the magic-user has grabbed both potions and force fed them down one of the mages throats, causing his bowels forcefully ejected from his anus. This included any and all excretory juices. The smell was so bad that Master Abbott didn’t bother moving from his well ventilated position by the door and Strife was quick to leave. The other mage though? He wasn’t so lucky. The smell and other forms of putrid filth and found their way up his nose. He died immediately.

Off in the distance, Prinnia had smelled a smell.

Downstairs, the cleric and drow had begun to engage in some kinky business. Or at least that’s what the now unconscious assassin was guessing, thanks to his super-hearing that was blessed upon him via his lost of consciousness. Or was it just a trick of his unconscious mind?

The currently walking assassin found herself in nearby cupboard. Upon her perusal she had stumbled upon a dagger sheathed by a note. The note was from The Daggermaster and it detailed that the dagger enchanted, but it didn’t say how. Prinnia wisely put it away for later. She proceeded to the next room over.

Strife and Master Abbott opened the door to the next room down and were greeted by a room full of mages. They noticed the same potion resting on their table and enquired about it’s creation. The most senior of the mages told them that it was a product that they were being hired to produce by a local store specialising in prank goods. They just hand’t yet worked out all of the kinks in the system. The two protagonists giggled slightly and joked their way out of the room and headed up the hall.

Just as they arrived at a T-section, they noticed Prinnia entering the room. She approached the man in the room, who was behind a desk, and tried to get him to spill the beans on the location of this idol. He wouldn’t relent, and thanks to the assassins poor choice in wording, he activated a somewhat silent alarm and called for security agents. She promptly dashed out of the room and outside of the foyer (the next floor down). A moment later both Master Abbott and Strife were questioned by a pair of security. After telling their account of events, the two agents were called into the mans office. Master Abbott and his magic-user companion continued on their quest to find this idol.

They quickly went past a rest area and headed up a flight of stairs.

There it was! The idol! The duo were quickly headed off by some guards. They requested to see the man in charge about the idol and were lead across to the table. From here they could see the entirety of the bookshelf adorning the room, and the magnificence of the idol seated before the Arch-Magi. All three parties sat down and discussed the future of the item.

During the course of this conversation it was revealed that the name of the evil warlock was Charles McManus and that he had obtained 7 evil idols in his youth which had corrupted his soul. He was now working on re-obtaining these lost artifacts. The Arch-Magi also revealed that the idol was recently re-enchanted with a good curse that would weaken the warlock, who was also his brother, so that there would be a chance of bringing him down. The Arch-Magi also removed the enchantment placed upon the heads of the magic-user and monk so they could choose to teleport on command from the warlock, or ignore it. The idol exchanged hands and that familiar ringing was heard by everyone in the group.

Shortly after the ringing, the team found themselves in the usual room. All who were injured were now fully healed, much to Lucy’s amazement. The warlock, McManus, wanted the idol and the team gave it to him. He immediately became weakened and it seemed the seals in the room became broken, allowing everyone in the room to gang up on him. The team got to work quickly and poured both bottles of red potion down the warlocks throat, causing him to spew gastric diarrhea from both ends of his body.

The team wanted more, they wanted his death. But the monk wouldn’t allow it and preferred for the authorities to deal with what was happening. The party managed to force the monk outside, thanks to the seals unlocking the door was now unlocked, and they took turns in belting into the warlock. Just as they thought they were about to deliver the final blow, the two assassins found themselves outside and the monk and magic-user found themselves back within the arch-magi’s tower.

What will happen next?

Did you enjoy the story? Who is your favorite character in the group ? What things would you have done differently ? Let us know what you think about the story and your predictions as to what is going to happen in the comments below.

All images courtesy of Wizards.

Gaming for as long as my memory serves me, probably longer.

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